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Quantum Leap

Being able to relax is really important. Some people love to play an instrument, chat with friends or go for a walk along the beach. I love watching sci fi tv! As embarrassing at that is, I can’t get enough!

My Dad was always a massive fan sci-fi, so I grew up watching shows such as Sliders, Battlestar Galactica, Lost in Space and Star Trek. I can even recall a few years ago having a conversation as to which Star Trek Enterprise ship was better!!

My all-time favourite show would have to be Quantum Leap and I recently started watching this again. For those of you who have never heard of this show, let me give a brief explanation of its plot.

Physicist Sam Beckett believed that time travel was possible and after years of research, decides to experiment with his “Quantum Leap” machine before anyone has the chance to stop him. Unfortunately for Sam, he becomes trapped leaping through time with only his hologram friend Al for guidance. Sam is informed he must correct mistakes of others in the past in order to eventually leap home.

It got me thinking about the past and things that we often wish we had done differently. Perhaps a missed opportunity or regret. I don’t think I have met anybody yet that hasn’t experienced at least one of these.

Sam is a character who is always saving someone, trying to fix broken relationships or being faced with the prejudices of the past. Quantum Leap always had a happy ending to each episode and I guess that is partly why I am drawn to it. We all love a happy ending right?!

Having regrets might feel like you are carrying shame or sadness regarding our past decisions or experiences. It may be that you regret a partner choice, a career path, not spending enough time with a loved one, not telling someone how much they mean to you, or maybe you just wanted to take more risks in life. Perhaps we feel guilty for the way we treated someone. Sadly, we are unable to use Sam’s Quantum Leap machine to go back into the past to correct mistakes or to ensure we have no regrets.

A huge challenge many of us have is allowing ourselves regrets, but not allowing ourselves to be paralysed by them.

So how can we do that?

Acknowledging how you feel is always a good first step and allowing space for these regrets to be felt and experienced. It can often be too easy to just brush it under the carpet without acknowledging or expressing how you feel. Stop, take a moment and allow yourself to know that we all make mistakes and it is natural to feel saddened by it.

Gently and kindly observe what you may have learnt form these mistakes. If you regret having hurt someone in the past, you can make a commitment to consider their needs and emotions more in the future. Perhaps your regrets may help you commit to increasing your awareness of other peoples feelings, or to be more respectful.

Recognising that we tried our best with the information and self-awareness we had at the time may help lessen the load. Holding onto this can often lead to us feeling like we do not desire happiness or love because of our actions in the past. Toxic shame can have a very damaging effect on your value and self-worth and is a topic for a future blog entry.

We can have regrets without being imprisoned by them, and we can’t be paralysed by every decision knowing we can’t Quantum Leap back in order to do it differently. Your regrets and the development that grows from them are part of who you are now. Your worth and value will be built on the choices you make to help you avoid regrets in the future. So don’t panic – even the bad decisions can help you become the person you want to be.

Image from Den of Geek

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